Asking for help can be difficult
It can often feel discouraging to ask for help with something, and researchers have looked at what the reason might be. They have concluded that it is because it makes you feel like a failure or that it’s difficult to disturb someone else. But those are feelings that lie with the person asking for help, the person being asked doesn’t think about it the same way.
Most people want to help!
The fact is that most of us enjoy helping others because it makes us feel both good and appreciated. However, this requires that you get a chance to spend time on and understand the task you are helping to solve, otherwise, it can have the opposite effect.
3 tips when asking for help
If it’s not something incredibly urgent, there are three things you can think of when asking for help to make it easier for the person who is asked:
– be specific!
It becomes easier to understand both what to help with and how long it might take if you know exactly what is involved. For example, if you ask someone to read a text, say what exactly the person is supposed to do. Is it proofread or to provide feedback? By being specific, you can avoid misunderstandings.
– give a time frame or a deadline.
If you ask someone for help, you cannot assume that they can immediately drop everything else and help. Therefore, check when you need feedback/ a solution and let the person you are asking for help decide when it is suitable, before the deadline.
– thank and give recognition.
Make sure to thank the person for the help, it means a lot when you put time and energy into helping. Additionally, if you are going to present the solution to someone else, please give credit to the person who helped. To lift up others who have been involved and contributed is not to show yourself weak, but rather to show yourself strong and competent to be able to ask for help when you need it and that you can work as a team.
Source: Stanford University
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